Nicolas Sarkozy

President of France

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  • In-Country Power
  • International Power
  • Respect
  • Military Strength
  • Intelligence
  • Special Skill: Marrying Hot Women

Official Stats

  • Official Title: President
  • Government: Well-established democracy
  • Years Left in Office: To 2012; re-election possible
  • Political Classification: Center-right
  • Education: MA in Law, DEA in Business Law
  • Age: 69 (born January 27, 1955)

Nicolas Sarkozy Facts and Information

Important Points

  • Sarkozy's biggest issue is modernizing the French economy and making it more productive and competitive. Good luck with that.
  • Sarkozy's economic policy embraces free trade and pro-business policies (would be a Republican in US politics) but has become more protectionist since the economic downturn
  • Sarkozy would be categorized as a strict conservative on most social issues
  • Very much in opposition with his predecessors, Sarkozy embraces a much more pro-active foreign policy
  • Very much in opposition with his predecessors, Sarkozy also has strengthened relationships with the US and Israel.

The Rundown

Sac de blue! Let’s talk about scrappy, spunky little Sarko! Nicolas Sarkozy, that is: President of France…and also co-prince of Andorra, which is a totally sweet but utter meaningless title that all French Presidents get.  He was elected in 2007 from the Union for a Popular Movement, a center-right political party, of which he was leader of for several years (they are kind of like the Republicans in the US). But Sarko is so much more than just a conservative cog! He is recognized by both right and left as a skilled politician and striking orator, likes wearing plenty of Rolex and gold bling, and married a smokin’ hot supermodel his first year in office! More importantly, he is trying to get France’s economy back on track and regain their mojo on the international stage as well.  That’s a tall order of french fries, so let’s tackle the Sarko scheme one step at a time…

On the home front, he promised to break from France’s past, cut taxes, and increase the general competitiveness of a nation that is generally viewed in the US as a bunch of surrendering socialist pansies. He has an extensive background in law and uses his impressive level of charisma and charm to show the public he understands their pain and is working on their woes. His political path began as a city councilor in a rich Parisian suburb. He soon worked his way up to city mayor and deputy in the National Assembly, where he was known as a skilled politician with serious savoir-faire.

He even became a national hero after personally negotiating a kindergarten hostage situation. He has been riding high in the polls for most of his career, and it appeared the Frenchies love for him was setting up a new Napoleonic era. He did, however, spark some controversy while serving in the previous president’s cabinet as he increased government spending on Muslim groups, fought urban violence, and decreased governmental control of the economy…all with a conservative strong arm that troubled some lefties in the country, which was a portend for things to come when he took the top slot of government.

While campaigning for president, Sarkozy’s goals included lower taxation, work reform, immigration reform, and modernizing France’s economy. Since winning the election, he’s pissed off some Frenchmen by following through with his promises… What?!? Yep. He’s worked to expand the French work week (they only work about 35 hours a week), and increase the retirement age (from 60 to the right ancient age of 62), both of which make the young and old French working class angry as hell. Well, those Frenchies are kind of known for their left-leaning, socialist, pro-labor, pro-worker attitudes….so this public outcry is really no surprise. But, shit, dudes! Your economy is sucking wind and your government is going broke, so something’s gotta give! And Sarko is the foot in their ass that is forcing that change.

Sarko’s also works to increase tolerance in the country (despite the legislature banning burqas…), as well as increasing interest in national heritage sites. He is all about preserving French culture big-time…and on that theme has taken a tough stance on immigration, which is mildly ironic, seeing as his father was a Hungarian immigrant. Finally, Sarkozy worked to reform government. Under his direction, the legislature approved reforms including a two-term presidential limit, adding veto powers to the legislature, and generally balancing the government. Overall, he has been trying to increase national pride and work ethic.

Sarkozy’s private life has been of particular interest to the general populace of France and the world at large. He is currently married to the mega-babe Italian model and singer, Carla Bruni. Bruni has previously dated Donald Trump, Nicolas Cage, Eric Clapton, and Mick Jagger, if that’s any attest to how hot this lady is. Sarkosy has been married before and has three children two with other equally attractive women. Bruni is a serious babe, though, for real; a nude photo of her recently got auctioned off for charity for a whopping $91,000. Sarko’s relationship has been more public than any other French politician, as he is often photographed by the paparazzi and featured in gossip magazines worldwide. Additionally, Sarkozy is often seen wearing expensive Rolex watches and frequently lounging on his personal yacht. Every country loves seeing their president living extravagantly and throwing their money around with no remorse during a recession! Don’t they?

Don’t care a french fry about French politics? That’s cool with me. But you need to know your Sarko for other reasons. On the world stage, Sarkozy has been trying to make France into a world power for the first time since…well…the colonial period. His revolution starts with his changes at home that he hopes will strengthen France’s economy, currently at number 6 in the world. He also went on an “apology tour,” visiting Algeria, and other former French colonies, acknowledging, for the first time, France’s rape and pillage of their colonies. Both of these set the foundations for his hopeful role as an international problem solver and innovator.

Sarkozy is what is referred to as an Atlanticist, meaning his policies generally are in support of the US, Canada, and Great Britain. Although he was opposed the war in Iraq, he usually can be counted on to back up the US. That being said, he is certainly not a lapdog. He’s fighting for a spot as an equal. As previously mentioned, he has been acting as an international peace-maker and negotiator, especially when it comes to Russia. He and Putin have partied together quite a few times. Most recently, Sarkozy convinced Russia to officially cancel the sale of a large number of missile systems to Iran.

Speaking of Iran: Sarkozy basically totally agrees with current US foreign policy concerning the Persians. He said that Iran is the biggest threat in the Middle East, and under no circumstances would he sit idly by while they acquired nuclear technology. Shit, man, he went as far as to subtly suggest that Iran would be bombed before he let them get the bomb. Damn! Sarko-balls-a-plenty!

Sarko has even reintroduced France into the NATO command structure for the first time since Charles de Gaulle (former president, ardent nationalist, and US-basher) pulled them out in 1960. De Gaulle wanted to focus on building a strong France around which a strong Europe could be rallied, so supporting the North Atlantic Treaty Organization was not at the top of his list. He didn’t withdraw their membership, just refused to support the military side of the organization. Sarkozy’s re-entry proves that France is up to the challenge of leading military exercises, which is essentially a requirement for being a NATO playa’ and true world power. In 2008, he served a 6-month term as president of the EU, where he pushed for action on climate change, and greatly challenged EU-China relations by meeting with the Dalai Lama in Poland. No fear!

Next year, France will hold both the presidency of the G8 and of the G20 and Sarkozy has many plans for his French leadership position. First, he would like to see China admitted to the G8 (forming the G9?), by the end of the year. This goal makes sense, since China is already on the UN Security Council and has one of the fastest growing economies in the world. However, the rest of Team West might be against the involvement of a communist nation in the Group. Second, he will press for a global tax on financial transactions…which really pisses off the ardent capitalists counties like the US and UK.  Third, he plans to work more on climate change legislation, a large passion of his. Finally, he wants to stabilize the international economy, especially after his experience coordinating response to Greece’s financial meltdown. He would like the world to develop global financial regulations and to move away from the dollar as the world’s reserve currency.

Recently, he has been taking a great deal of flak over a controversy involving his deportation of Romanian gypsies out of France and back to their home country. He has been criticized and called a racist for his new stringent immigration policy from a wide range of organizations from the Pope, to Hindus, to half of the European Union and many more. This policy shows his determination and dedication as a leader despite the unpopularity of the decision at a time where his poll numbers are at an all-time low. In addition, his policy of trying to jump start and grow the economy of France has caused protests and other rifts between his people. He has tried to increase the work week hours and increase the retirement age from 60 to 62. This retirement change has resulted in multiple protests with the next scheduled for September 25. In other words, he is trying to take the laziness out of the French workforce, now there’s a challenge. Sarkozy is trying to revive the economy as best he can despite having to cut projected economic growth from 2.5 to 2%.

Sarkozy’s recent policies toward the US combat involvement in the Middle East have shifted a great deal over the years. He continues to support withdrawing troops from Iraq while also offering his support for a political resolution. In Afghanistan, he has decided to increase troop involvement and support to the war at a time where international support has dwindled a great deal. If it hasn’t been clear for awhile it should be now that he and former US President Bush share similar ideals. And you already know how he feels about Iran! He is set for pre-emptive ass-whipping!  A leader who wants to fight the good fight and make his people work…no wonder his poll numbers are in the can-can.

Why else is it savvy to know Sarko? Well, we can mock the French for their white-flag waving follies of the past, but they actually are a powerful international player. Nick Sarkozy does hold the authorization codes of the French nuclear arsenal…because of course they are a declared nuclear power. On top of that, France does have a decently sized and technologically advanced military…and under Sarkozy will exactly double the number of French aircraft carriers to 2.

France is also a NATO member, and under Sarkozy’s prompting, has re-joined the leadership circle in the military organization after years of scoffing it. Well, the French are really good at scoffing. And for reasons which still elude most, France also holds veto power as a member of the UN Permanent Security Council. As a core component and natural leader of the EU, of the UN, of Team West, and even NATO, the leader of those Bordeaux-sipping, cheese-eating surrender monkeys is always an important figure to know on the world stage.

Long story short, know who Nick Sarkozy is. Know that he has an extremely similar world outlook as the former Bush White House. And know this: we are very likely to see the French being more pro-active on the world stage than they have been since they sent Lafayette over to the colonies to help kick some British ass. We will see the Frenchies start to take a more central role in a lot of the world’s hotspots…be it in Africa, Iraq, Afghanistan, or even a drug-free Tour de France. And Nicolas is doing his damnedest to rejuvenate the sputtering French economy, which is the 6th largest in the world. Good luck with all that my French friend. Sarko certainly does have a full plate in front of him…and I ain’t talkin’ about escargot neither!


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