World Pissing Match: Russia Pisses Off US; US Pisses Off China & Turkey; Turkey Pisses Off Iraq,
Hello hello hello again plaid party people! Too many good stories to choose from today…so let’s talk about them all! In a first for the Avenger, we will tie together a trifecta of titillating tidbits with the tantalizing tie between then being irritation. Pissed to be exact! It seems today is the day that most major powers on the planet decided to simultaneously piss in each other’s corn flakes! How hilarious! All in a day’s work I suppose, so let’s get to this summary…shall we?
Russia, Iran harden against West
Bush warns Putin over ‘World War Three’
For starters, one of the planet’s bad asses of all time Vlad ‘the man’ Putin of Russia decided to pay a visit to his homies down in
Putin: Great to meet you, Supreme Leader of
Ayatollah: Allah be praised, you Russian infidel. We don’t drink alcohol in my country.
Putin: Oh. Well, that’s okay. In my country most Muslims and foreigners in general are discriminated against. Hell, we’ve been blowing up Chechen Muslims for years.
Ayatollah: Hmmm… I see. Well, we don’t really have anything in common, do we?
Putin: Um…nope. Not really. Oh wait! Would you like me to show you some Judo?
Ayatollah: No. That would be gay. And we don’t have any gay people in my country either.
Putin:Oh. Um. Then I guess we don’t have much to talk about…
—Long, uncomfortable silence—
Ayatollah: Well, there is always pissing off the Americans….
Putin: Oh yeah! We are good at that! Let’s work together on that point …what did you have in mind?
Which brings us back to the topic at hand. Let’s get to the pissed part…After talking with President Ahmadinejad, Putin declared that
On top of that, Russia and Iran just wrapped up a summit of ‘Caspian Sea nations’ in which they all signed a declaration which prohibits any other country on the planet from using their states for 
attacks on one another “under any circumstances”. Caspian summit a triumph for Iran You get that? Read between the lines: In other words, all those countries agree that they will not help the
So President Bush is so pissed that he is suggesting that this may be a lead up to WW3! Ha! Dude! Chill out! There are a couple of things that someone should suggest to the Americans to calm them down:
1)Under the NPT (the UN Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty), developing nuclear technology for power creation is totally acceptable.
2)Let’s go ahead and run with the
To be fair to the
Apparently the
U.S. honor for Dalai Lama angers China
Bush dismisses Chinese criticism over Dalai Lama
I
n honoring the Dalai Lama, the
bill that made its way through a House committee last week. See Turkey is Steamed and Ready; but this ain’t no Thanksgiving for US I reported on that shit a few days back from the Turk-Iraq border, and the shit is heating up even more! While I was there, about 50,000-60,000 Turkish troops with a butt load of tanks and guns were amassing. They are about ready to get the party started. What party? The invasion of Iraq to track down some Kurdish terrorists.
Turks’ vote backs right to use force inside Iraq
Turkey votes to send troops into northen Iraq
And Turkey is still so pissed about that US committee vote, that they Turkish parliament went ahead and voted 507 to 19 to allow the armed forces to launch a cross-border assault against Kurdish insurgents based in northern Iraq. The 19 that voted ‘no’ were probably taken out back for a ass-whoopin’ shortly after the proceedings. Ordinarily, the
And it goes without saying that the Iraqis are pissed about these Turkish developments…
Angry Iraqi Kurds say Turkish move would destabilise region
Iraq Kurds warn Turkey against ‘illegal’ incursion vote
Kurds ‘will fight Turkish raids’
Although
Despite the current Iraqi predicament, the idea of yet another country sending in troops is seriously 
pissing them off…particularly since the northern part of
And the prospect of that seriously pisses off the
Simply pissed!
And now we have come full circle in our pissing match for the day. Those world leaders certainly have been busy boys today, infuriating each other like its going out of style!
And they are pissed!
Japan Unearths Fukuda Fossil, Promotes it to Prime Minister
Holy shit! Sorry for the absence my Plaid Friends….but somehow I just woke up in a Toyko back alley, ringside at an illegal sumo competition in which competitors wrestle to the death while simultaneously engaged in an all-you-can-eat sushi showdown. And the fish wraps and fat rolls are flying! Dudes, you do not want to get in-between a sumo and his sushi. What an event! Unfortunately, the last thing I remember was going head to head with Vladimir Putin doing caviar-vodka bombs outside Moscow…but that was about four days ago I think….My, how time flies. However, this is a fortuitous touch down in Toyko, because I have been meaning to introduce you to the newest world leader of note…our main Japanese squeeze, Prime Minister Fukuda:
Japan PM sets out policy agenda
Japan May Cut Support of Afghan Mission
DIAM says new Prime Minister Fukuda positive for Japan
Fukuda Is More Pragmatic Than Former PM
Japan PM Fukuda likely to build on Abe’s Asia policy
Fukuda? Sounds like a Japanese curse word. I love it man! But I’ve heard that you folks are prepping for a mid-term exam, so I’ll keep this rant brief. Yasuo Fukuda is this ancient-ass dude (he’s 71 years old) who just replaced Shinzo Abe as the Prime Minister of Japan. Back up the sake cart for a second. What happened to Abe? You remember me ranting about Abe in the past, yes?
Poor Abe. He had a rough year to say the least. After riding into the Prime Minister position on the coat-tails of his extremely popular predecessor Junichiro Koizumi, ‘Honest’ Abe just kept getting the shit kicked out of him from the word go. His administration was beset by multiple scandals (most of which started before Abe even took office); he took a public pounding for downplaying Japanese war atrocities during WWII (specifically, the use of Korean ‘comfort women’ aka indentured sex slaves); and then his political party got smacked down in the 2007 elections (in which they essentially lost control of the upper house of the Diet—which is the Japanese ‘Congress’).
But the final straw came about a month ago when it became clear that the Diet was not going to pass Abe’s request to continue to use Japanese naval vessels to support the
Following Abe’s resignation in September 2007, our new boy Fukuda announced that he would run in the Liberal Democratic Party (LDP) leadership election, which would also 
determine the prime minister, given the LDP’s majority in the House of Representatives. Just so you know: the LDP would be the equivalent of the Republican Party in the
So Fukuda won the LDP party leadership, and then instantaneously was formally elected as
Prime Minister Fukuda has inherited the split Congress situation from Abe, but is known to be a dude who can quietly get folks working together—a unifier. He is already distanced from all of Abe’s troubles, so he stands a better chance of getting the government to work with him, and stands a much better chance of getting some of the LDP’s legislation through. But make no bones about it: the Diet is split, so he will have to work hard to get things passed, and many folks in the opposing political party are already promising to make his life suck, just like they did to Abe.
Specifically referenced in a story above, the issue of continued Japanese naval support for the
Because 
administration (both political parties are conservative, right-center). And sending those Japanese troops to help the US in the first place was not only a big sign of support for US foreign policy, but was a huge freakin’ deal in Asia because it was the first time that Japanese troops had been used anywhere outside Japan since WWII! It was a very big deal! To pull back support for the
FYI: Most Japanese folks did not support the use of their troops abroad, as they interpreted this as counter-intuitive to their pacifist constitution which bans the use of an active military for anything other than self-defense of the island nation itself. The Japanese leadership was compelled to do it anyway as a sign of support for its #1 ally, the
On a more positive front, Fukuda will likely continue the work of his predecessor Abe in mending ties with Asia countries, specifically
Plaid Avenger tip: watch for Fukuda to take numerous trips to neighboring Asian countries in an effort to better diplomatic relations—and I’ll bet he does way more Asian partying than any Prime Minister before him. Especially if his domestic agenda gets smacked down by the Diet. When a leader gets stymied at home, the best ones simply go abroad and work on their foreign policy…and he may be old, but Fukuda ain’t no fool.
To finish this rant, allow me to point out a specific policy which demonstrates Fukuda’s much more open policy to dialogue with
So know you know a little about this Fukuda dude. And you need to know this guy! He does lead the second largest economy on earth, is a huge
Fukuda: He’s old, but not dead yet. And I hear that Viagra also sharpens your political skills…..hmmmmm….I’ve got to party with this dude.
The State Can Take It or Leave It: Nationalization v. Privatization
What is happening my plaid party people? The Avenger decided to stay on here in Russia for another day to work off my wicked Putin-induced vodka martini hangover…and to investigate the nationalization of Russian oil; a process that has also been going down in Kazakhstan, in Bolivia, and in Venezuela too. And man, the
How Russia is Nationalized: The Oil Sector
Zimbabwe Votes to Take Control of Foreign-Owned Mines
Exxon pursues arbitration against Venezuela over seizure of oil assets
Chavez threatens to nationalize Venezuelan private schools
Bolivian President Seizes Gas Industry
…and the opposite side of the coin:
Japan begins privatization of its mammoth postal system
Activists Oppose Egyptian Healthcare Privatization
Iran to Privatize Airline, Banks
India’s Privatization Plan Is On Track
So what’s the deal with these two terms? They are polar opposites my friends, and folks around the planet have passionate views about the good or evil effects that nationalization or privatization can produce. People get downright hot and bothered about these terms! And in some circumstances, initiating these actions has caused political dissent, diplomatic friction, or outright violent hostilities between peoples, companies, and even countries! Damn! Why so much heat? First…what are they?
Nationalization is a process whereby a government takes control of an economic activity that was owned by and/or run by private individuals/companies hands. It could be transportation, corn, water, uranium, or even bananas…but usually it happens to high-dollar commodities. For example: Exxon acquires rights thru a government contract to pump shit tons of oil out of selected oil fields in 
goes there and sets up shop, building infrastructure like the oil wells and pipelines, and starts pumping and exporting oil. But then Hugo Chavez gets elected President of Venezuela and decides that Exxon is making too much money on that oil, and since the oil is actually in his country, he decides to take it back. All of it. So Hugo would nationalize the field, along with all the infrastructure that’s now on it, and send Exxon packing. Can you dig that?
But it never really works that simply. Even in this Venezuela/Exxon example (which actually happened) Hugo didn’t simply just kick Exxon out and take their shit; he offered to buy back their shares and their investments at a fair market value. Sometimes the parties have to go to court to negotiate these settlements (see Exxon story above). Nationalization of an industry often involves the government simply re-writing all prior contracts with the companies in such a way that the state owns more than 50% of the action. But make no bones about it: if the companies refuse to co-operate or sell back their shares, then the state will just take the shit from them!
And OMG nationalization so completely pisses off ‘the West’…especially the
So why would a state do this nationalization gig? Sometimes its done to protect a critical industry in times of war or emergency (some countries have nationalized steel during wartimes); sometimes its done because the industry is a matter of national security (Israel runs its airline industry); sometimes its done to an industry that is floundering and about to crash on its own (perhaps the US/health care issue). But more often than not, a state will reclaim rights on an industry that it feels it’s getting ripped off in. Stick with the oil example: when Exxon or Shell or anybody else is pumping oil out of
Let’s say a barrel of crude sells for $50 on the international market; Exxon may pay $5 to
Oh, by the way, did you see President Evo Morales of Bolivia on the Daily Show with John Stewart last 
week? Totally hilarious! And Evo referenced why he decided to nationalize his countries oil and natural gas: “On the issue of nationalization of oil and gas,” Morales said, “in 2005, before I came president, the Bolivian state received only 300 million dollars from its oil and gas exports. And now since they’ve been nationalized, the Bolivian state receives more than two billion dollars. Therefore, we followed through on what we promised.”
Are you starting to realize why this is happening at this particular juncture in history, particularly in the energy sectors? If you answered: ‘because the price of oil is freakin’ high, and expected to get even higher’ than you win the prize! Oil producing states see the future sales going nowhere but up, and want to have a bigger slice of the pie for themselves. Oil is one of those special commodities that kind of defies free market capitalism–in that lots of states control their industry as opposed to letting private individuals run the show. See map below for a few countries of note… And while die-hard capitalist countries claim that governments cannot run industries as well as private corporations, those states that are controlling their oil do seem to be making a holy shit load of cash right now…despite the fact that the private industry isn’t in charge. And speaking of private….
Privatization is precisely the opposite of nationalization: it’s when a state sells off an industry or 
business that it controls to a private entity, most often a company/corporation. Look to the above story from
The theory goes like this: because private entities are motivated to maximize profits, they will do a better job making an industry like a post office more efficient, or they will work harder to find more oil, and are more flexible to invent new technologies and try new approaches which make the business run the best. Remember: one of the golden rules of capitalism is that competition will weed out the least efficient, and the better mousetrap will win every time. Folks of this opinion believe that governments are clunky, inefficient—and because they don’t have to compete with anybody—are uncompetitive! No shit? Lack of competition makes you become uncompetitive? Yeah, I can dig that!
Places like 
privatizing like mad right now.
And its not like the governments simply privatize the industry and then just walk away poorer for the experience. Capitalist theory would suggest that not only does the state make money on the initial sale of the industry, but in the long run will make way more in profits by simply taking a cut of the profits and/or taxing the service/product. Since private business will do it better, there will be more oil or more uranium or more corn or more stamped letters to tax…therefore the state makes more money! And without having to actually spend money running the damn show! You dig?
Does it sound like I’m picking sides on this nationalize/privatize debate? Don’t be fooled. The Plaid Avenger is here to tell you this: this is complicated shit, and there is no wrong or right side here. It really goes on a case by case basis in my book. Does private industry typically do shit better than government-run shit? Absolutely! Are some countries getting totally reamed by some private corporations? Absolutely! Are some states unfairly grabbing shit from corporations whose time and investments made the industry profitable in the first place? Absolutely! Are some multinational corporations total scumbags who use their money and power to corrupt and control industries within a state? Ab-so-fucking-lutely!
So pay attention to which states are selling, and which states are buying, their industries. And also pay attention to which industries are up for grabs. You will hear a lot in the 
nationalization of the oil industry; and in
I just hope I can still get my damn collectable Godzilla stamps in Toyko…even if it is from a private vendor…
10,000 + 8888 = ‘Ta-Ta’ To Than Shwe?
Holy shit! We got game on again here in 
this party started! 10,000 monks to be exact. And they are starting to get open support from the masses too…in a situation that is becoming eerily similar to the 8888 Uprising—remember that? This is a Plaid Avenger update story, since I have just reported from
Even as good as I am, I never would have predicted this crazy whack turn of events. Monks making my girl Aung San Suu Kyi cry? Wow. Totally insane. General Than Shwe and his band of merry merchants of death are up against the ropes to be sure….and the time may be right for their well-deserved departure. But don’t count those assholes out just as yet, because they have a long history of crushing their own citizenry. But first, to the news…
Protests swell against Burma’s military regime
Burma march largest in 20 years
Suu Kyi greets Burma protesters
Regional perspective: UN Security Council: The real battle on Burma
ASEAN leader appeals for restraint amid Myanmar’s growing anti-government protests
So what the hell has been going on this weekend, and why might this be the right time for us to say ‘ta-ta’ to Than Shwe? As seen from the stories above and the Plaid Avenger’s previous rant, the Burmese Buddhists have had enough, and have organized and taken to the streets. This all started as a protest over a hike in fuel process a month ago, but as predicted by the Plaid, has become a general movement across the country to get rid of the ruling military junta jack-asses, and finally implement freedom and democracy for the Burmese people. Sweet! Go guys go!
In a complete surprise move, they marched past Aung San Suu Kyi’s domicile, where our favorite freedom-fighter-hottie has been held in house-arrest for most of the past 15 years—and Suu Kyi came out to greet them, said nothing, but just wept for joy! Damn! These people are facing certain death and destruction, and they just keep putting themselves out there! How awesome!
So the monks are on the march, and are now saying that they will go on protesting indefinitely until the junta is jettisoned. A bunch of holy dudes without any weapons at all are preparing to face up against the Generals, who of course control the entire army. And you know what happens when dudes without guns fight dudes with guns….so this could turn nasty at any given second. So why hasn’t it yet?
Because the Generals don’t want to appear to be the butcher bastards that they actually are. Buddhist monks, like holy men in most places, are revered in 
a monk massacre may in fact incite the masses to go completely nuts and tear the government to bits. And make no bones about it: those monks know what they are doing…and they are apparently every bit prepared to face the guns and die for their cause.
So the Generals are in a real tricky spot right now…. They don’t want to appear weak, otherwise the fighters for freedom will be embolden to do more, and at the same time don’t want to get into a monk-mayhem-massacre to establish their authority. So they are doing nothing for now. But do not start the celebrations yet—if those assholes get put up against a wall, they will order the massacre of every man, woman and child in
So why might it actually be time for change in
1) We live in the modern world. Communications are now instantaneous and global. If the junta starts widespread massacres, the entire world will know about it immediately. And due to global news sources, a lot more people know about the Burmese situation and are following its every move…unlike ever before. They could get away with that shit 20 years ago without anybody knowing about it, but not anymore.
2) The junta DOES NOT want the bad press.
3)
But maybe you are asking, ‘Why now?’ ‘Why would
The Plaid Avenger instinct is that they will not. Remember, China’s reputation is already on the ropes from all the shitty products that they have been exporting here lately, and they are hosting the Olympics—so trust me, the Chinese DO NOT want any Than Shwe tarnish on their reputation right now; they are going to bail if killing starts!
And that would be the one big thing that would end this Burmese mess once and for all—for 
the issue has always been killed before it could come up. With the Frenchies now on Team US/UK, you can be sure that if a massacre starts in
But speaking of western countries, its time for me to change out of my plaid Buddhist 
robes and head back west to
Go get’em monks!
Permanent Possessors of Power: the Fabulous 5!
Forget the Fantastic 4, you want to know about the Fabulous 5! Greetings from the 
least of which is the Avenger knocking back a dozen big-ass Manhattans—my mixed drink of choice here in the big city. Hey, the town’s so nice they named it twice, so I have to drink twice as much when I party here! But I digress as usual….While this weekend’s meeting will cover many tipples and topics, I just wanted to give you a quick rant about the UN’s most powerful component: the UN Permanent Security Council. Check out these stories related to this group’s recent activity:
Security Council reps discuss Iranian sanctions
Security Council Reform Resolution Fuels German Hope for Seat
Signs of shift in Iran stand-off
U.N. to revisit Security Council growth
U.N. Security Council has imposed an arms embargo on Sudan
The United Nations Security Council (UNSC) is the main organ of the UN charged with 
maintaining peace and security among countries. While lots of other committees do lots of other shit, all that shit only amounts to recommendations that are made to countries of the world. However, the Security Council has the power to make decisions which member governments must carry out under the UN Charter—a charter which all members states have agreed to. Starting to get the picture here? If the Security Council passes a resolution, it must be enforced…by force if necessary!
In example: if a country on the Security Council proposes a resolution to bomb Burma, and that resolution passes, then the UN has to act on it, and Burma will be bombed. That is an extreme scenario, but you get the point. In 1950, it was just such a UN resolution that led to the invasion of
But let’s look at the mechanics of how this shit actually works. The Security Council is made up of 15 member states, consisting of five permanent seats and ten temporary 
seats. Ah! Now we finally see the ‘permanent’ part of this group, and the reason for this blog. The permanent five are the
But the big 5! That is where all the action really is! Why? Because the Permanent Security Council members have this one all important distinction: veto power! Any one of the 5 permanent members can stop any resolution dead in its tracks.
Why so much drama? Because for the UN to actually send troops or aid to any part of the world requires a resolution from the council. See, the entire Security Council votes on all issues, with each country getting one vote. For any resolution to pass, it must have at least 9 ‘yes’ votes, and zero ‘veto’ votes from any of the permanent 5. And the big permanent 5 don’t always see eye to eye on what the UN should be doing, because they all have different allies and strategic partners and motivations to consider. So to keep our example going, the
Need another example? Just think back to the lead-up to the current
To keep it even more real, consider the current Iranian situation as referenced in the 
stories above. The
Just as a side note:
And you should know that a country can actually decide not to vote at all—which happens quite a bit with the Chinese. They might not like a resolution, but if 
everyone else wants it, they will just not vote, thereby saving face. To keep our Iranian example: if the Russians eventually agree to some use of force against Iran, China will not want to stand in the way of a resolution that everyone wants, so they will abstain from the vote….so they won’t piss off the US, UK and France, and at the same time can tell the Iranians “Hey, don’t be pissed at us! We didn’t vote for it! Send your terrorist to their countries, not ours!” See how this shit works?
To finish, you just got to know your Permanent Security Council 5, and how their behavior in large part determines the actions of the entire UN. Many folks want to expand the Permanent Security Council membership and change some of the rules to better represent the world and end the predictable stalemates. Check the stories above for activity on that front…and know this:
Hmmm….Germany….isn’t it about time for Octoberfest celebrations to begin?
——-
Keep in Touch with Plaid Updates
Get the University Textbook
The Plaid Avenger's World
Are you a college professor teaching World Regions or Global Political classes? Pick up the cutting edge, most entertainly educating textbook currently on the market.
PreviewGet the Comic Books
Issue 2: Battle For Burma
Well, the battle for the heart and soul of this country is on, but no one outside Burma seems to be able to do a damn thing about it! Why not?
Preview